It’s Saturday, a band just started playing, I look up, and the drummer’s wearing a dress.
So, what, right? Cool. A guy expressing some creativity. I like it. But I have a few problems with it, naturally.
#1: The dress is butt ugly.
#2: None of the other guy’s are wearing a costume.
I’m going to address the second problem first. In a play, you have to have EVERYONE wearing a costume. It’s about consistency. It breaks the third wall, when some of the characters are out of costume, wearing t-shirts and jeans.
So, bands, if 1 of you are going to wear a mask or a dress, YOU ALL GOT TO.
The guy came up to the bar, and I addressed the first infraction with him personally.
Listen, I say, I like the idea of wearing a dress on stage, but wearing the thrift shop, ugly-ass dress is PLAYED OUT. How bout you wear something sexy. Black dress, maybe a bra or slip underneath. Check out the traps on 4chan for ideas, or any poster of the New York Dolls.
Put on some make-up, maybe some high-heels. This is 2013. Turn on the boys, turn on the girls.
Let’s sell some records, know what I’m saying?
From my heart to yours,
Clint Curtis. Bartender.