Mouth Orgasm

These 2 guys walk into the bar, one with blond dreadlocks, the other, clean-cut, sideburns, one of them is carrying a box, they walk up.  Ohhh, I say, what you got there?  Cupcakes?  (Do you have to be necessarily gay to walk into a bar with cupcakes?  I dunno. It’s 2013. I’m cool with it. Maybe I’ll even try it. Why the hell not?). The one holding the cupcakes says, yeah, actually they are. Good, I say. I want one. You want one? he asks. Hell yeah I want one. I’ll devour that shit. I gotta sweet tooth, so don’t stop me.

He opens the box, help yourself, he says. Have 2. Don’t mind if I do, I say, and grab 2. For that, let me buy you a drink. Even trade. He says, great. Sounds like a deal. I put the cupcakes behind the bar, for later.

It starts dying down, an hour later, I think, yeah, I’ll have a bite of that cupcake. Looks like the new fangly gourmet shit, too.

I bite into it. OH.  MY.  GOD!!!!!   That is the most incredible cupcake to ever hit my mouth. I’m having a mouth ORGASM. I can’t talk. I’m shoving my face with this thing. My Lord.

I don’t do advertising for my blog, but forget about it. If you live in Des Moines, Iowa, or just visiting, go to CREME on Ingersoll. Best, most scrumptious cupcake you’ll ever have.

Screw it. I’m buyin 2 dozen.  Bringin em into the bar.


From my heart to yours,

Clint Curtis. Bartender.

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