Hanging Up On Larry David

I’m at the club. Really good crowd. I know a lot of my posts start out with somethin like, the place is dead, but we do have decent shows, I promise you. Anyway, this band gets up on stage, lead singer’s real charismatic. I love that. Tellin great stories in between songs. So he starts tellin this story, and I’ll never forget it.

He gets a phone call one day, picks up, and the guy says, is this Milano? And he says, yeah, you got im. Who’s this? The guy on the other end says, this is Larry David. Milano says, fuck off, and hangs up on him, thinkin it’s one of his buddy’s pullin a practical joke. The phone rings five minutes later, this time it’s a woman. Hi, this is so-and-so, I’m Larry David’s assistant, and I assure you, he was the one who just called you. Milano says, holy shit. Really? What does he want? Well, are you available to talk to him? Milano says, fuck yeah. I love Seinfeld.

Larry gets on the line. Yeah, you gonna hang up on me again? No, sir, Milano says. What can I do for ya? Well, I got this show I’m workin on starring Kirstie Alley, and I’d liked to use your song Bubble Butt, for the theme song. Milano says, I don’t know. Kirstie Alley? I’m not sure if I’m into that. Larry David says, I’ll pay you $20,000. Then Milano says,

Sign me up.

I guess the show went nowhere, but the guy indeed made 20 G’s, and got to talk to Larry Freaking David.

And I thought that was pretty, pretty, pretty cool.

From my heart to yours,

Clint Curtis. Bartender.


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