Whole Foods Metal

There’s a band playing on stage, and I keep on looking at the guitarist, because I swear to God, it looks like he’s wearing a Whole Foods T-Shirt. And it’s a metal band. It’s not a Whole Foods T-Shirt though, but a shirt that has the same font on it. And the first word starts with a W. I can’t really make it out exactly what it says. But it should say Whole Foods, ’cause that would be a way rad t-shirt to wear if you were a guitarist in a metal band.

I approach this guy at the bar, he orders a PBR, I know him, he’s a drummer in a metal band, I go, do you think it would be funny to wear a Whole Foods T-Shirt on stage when you’re playing in a metal band?  He says, I dunno. Why? Well, I say, it’s like an oxymoron, you got this guy, really pissed off at the world, long, sweaty hair in his face, and he’s sporting a T-Shirt from a gourmet grocery store. He says, I dunno. Why do you ask?

Whatever, I say. Never mind.

From my heart to yours,

Clint Curtis. Bartender.

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