I Can’t Get This Long Hair Off My Fingers

I’m behind the bar, it’s Thursday, pretty busy. Birthday party, about 30 people in that group. Regulars. Stragglers. Bar flies. People wanting to be fire fighters.

I’m washing dishes, oh SHIT. Guess what?  There’s a long hair entwined in my fingertips. This is a disgusting feeling to me. I HATE STRAY HAIRS. Sure I love raking my hand through a beautiful girl’s hair. But when it falls out, and ends up caught in my fingers?!?!  Just nasty.

And in the shower too!!!  I can’t stand seeing those long stray hairs. I have to go get a big wad of toilet paper, grab onto it, throw it in the toilet, flush as fast as I can. And then those stray hairs, after falling into the sink, clog it up. And that shit Drano don’t work, are you kidding me? Well…better call the plumber, there’s 200 bucks

Down the drain.

I’m doing dishes, my hand’s wet, and there’s this hair that will not come off. It’s like super-glued onto my fingers. I shake my hand. Nope still there. I run the faucet, try to flush it out.

And then you wait a moment…ok, relief. It’s gone. I got it off.



-Clint Curtis


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